Beer commercials are fucking awesome. I don’t even drink beer and I like watching them. This is because they tell you which product is the best one to buy AND they teach you the greatest skill ever: How to get surrounded by the hottest chicks you’ve ever seen.
And I’m not talking about the dudes you hang out with in your basement, no I’m talking about super model chicks. The kind of super model chicks that are bound to be at your neighborhood bar. Because where do you think chicks go at night? The neighborhood bar. And you know what’s double sweet? The bouncers don’t let the ugly chicks in. So when you find yourself at your neighborhood bar all you have to do… stay with me here… is purchase any beer that has a commercial depicting hot chicks flocking towards the dudes drinking that beer. I know there are a lot of variables here, but try to keep up; it’s not algebra. Fuck dude, let me put it this way, I don’t have that many rules in life but #1 is – If you can get yourself surrounded by hot chicks, do that.

Going to an Elevaters concert is kind of like drowning in a sea of some type of hot cat that shall not be named here. It would be impolite to name the kind of cat. Come on now, my Grandmother reads this. And I love my Grandmother. Try to appreciate the picture I am painting for you here. Hot chicks. I’d tell you what their music sounds like but I’m always busy giving my number out at their shows. I can never actually pay attention. I hear it’s pretty good (No pun intended). Hahaha!*

The picture I’m painting is that this Wednesday from 7-10 the West LA Concert Series will be bumping at the West LA Civic Center. The Elevaters go on at 9.
The Ventriloquists and Roxwels (featuring Gaknew) kick the night off at 7. It’s a rad event. The Koji BBQ trucks make an appearance. Chicks love that stuff. Offer to buy them some, they will maul you like that Tiger did to that dude Roy or something like that. I promise you. If you think I’m kidding, well try to laugh off the scars on my back. Nails are sharp. Especially the way they sharpen them with those crazy files. All the time. After you eat and listen to music there is an after party which is expensive as fuck to get in. Unless you lean in and whisper mad creepy style “West LA Summer Concert Series” to the bouncer lady. Then she just lets you in for free and you look super slick for the ladies. Don’t fuck that secret coded message up, though. They’ll just stare at you like they have no idea what you are talking about. They will not help you out if you say “West Summer Concert Series.” You will be standing there looking like you have no idea what you are talking about… and then you’ll have to fork over mad flow. Better just to commit it to memory now. You can check out some tracks from Elevaters if you really want to get your juices warmed up. Sidenote: If you don’t like Daft Punk I hope something slightly awful but not that bad happens to you in a series of threes. Soon. Get directions to the show here and see the official website here.
Grab the Elevaters album at Amazon

Elevaters – “Lady Love”
Elevaters – “Daft Punk Tribute”

*Bringing it back

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