No Sophomore Slump for Christian Cuff’s Chalkboard
Sequels are hard to get right. Just ask MGMT. The first one is easy. No one knows what to expect. The second one though? That’s tough. Preconceived notions are tough demons to dispel for anyone.
Apparently not so much for Christian Cuff though. Chalkboard is his version of taking you on an adventure. And he’s going to take you everywhere he’s ever been. And you’re going to like it from start to finish. I’m tired of hearing people tell me the art of the album is dead. Hit this from front to back and try to tell me that again. There are no singles to be had here. You need all of the songs. It would be like reading a mystery novel but only reading through certain chapters.
Now, there are few bands that can rope me in with their lyrical wordsmithing. Listen, I’m the first in line to be a lush for hook laden pop songs, but even though I’ve heard Umbrella over a thousand times, I still can’t remember any of the lyrics. Unless it’s about the part where Rihanna wants me under her umbrella.* Not this. Every lyric off Chalkboard has the weight of a thousand pounds behind it. Filled with vivid imagery mixed with metaphors reflecting on life’s highs and curveballs served up by a healthy dose of sultry vocals, Chalkboard already has me anticipating Christian’s next release. Until then: the melodic – rhythm driven bass lines will woo you, the strings will sex you up, the drums will get you thumping limbs, and the vocals will sooth you. And that is just the half of it.
I think I just listened to Hobo Island about 30 straight times.
Order the hardcopy here.
Download the digital version here.
Christian Cuff – “Hobo Island”
Christian Cuff – E’s Fever
* Why does she want me under her umbrella again? Stunning good looks aside of course.
(500) Days of Weezy OR “Bad Choices Lead To Good Albums”
Whiskey pong was a bad choice.
Sometimes, something sounds like a great idea at the time, like whiskey pong (especially after being already drunk from the flowing keg of cider), only to find out later* that it was in fact a BAD IDEA.
But by the same token something may sound like an awful idea, only to prove itself to be a brilliant and original idea that in hindsight you WISH you’d thought of first. And so it goes with My Sick Uncle’s “non” mash-up album (500) Days of Weezy that pits Weezy F. Baby against… wait for it… that’s right… you are smarter than you look… the (500) Days of Summer soundtrack. Loyal readers will remember my Week. Long. Obsession. with said movie album.
Who would have thought the jailed rapper could even be laid on top of the WHITEST of the white stuff: A hipster love-song to white people in a hazy, de-urbanized take on LA that focuses on old white architecture and the IKEA aesthetic. Seriously? You wanna put LIL WAYNE into that mix? Are you crazy?
Yes, yes, he is. But awesomely so.
Some tracks end up working better than others. The Hall & Oates mash-up “Lollipop Dreams” is my least favorite, but perhaps that’s because I’m a child of the 80s and expected too much from this one specifically. “Fear Forever” introduces Doves not only to Wayne, but Mr. Marshall Mathers as well. The Smiths tracks are great. “Us (Me and Mrs. Officer)” is a better Regina Spektor mix than her other “Hero (Oh, oh, oh).” But I’ll shut up, and let you make your own opinions cause you can download the whole thing right here.
My Sick Uncle – “Fear Forever” (Lil’ Wayne & Eminem vs Doves)
My Sick Uncle – “Mushababy” (Lil’ Wayne vs Feist)
My Sick Uncle – “Sweet Stunt Positions” (Lil’ Wayne vs The Temper Trap)
And for good measure, because I was reminded of another great remix of the song…
Fiest – “Mushaboom” (Postal Service Remix)
*AKA the next morning on someone else’s couch as you wake up from the sunlight sucker-punch streaming in through the window, a bright reminder of dark choices.
Nosaj Thing Remixing Charlotte Gainsbourg, Beck, and the XX. I Can’t Wait.
http://www.vimeo.com/5817444 http://www.vimeo.com/4622087Hypothetically speaking, say The Church of Scientology was, a Bank Robber who had taken hostages. And everyone who was a Scientologist was a hostage. With me so far? Okay, now let’s pretend we are the ‘negotiators’ on the outside. Like the movie with Kevin Spacey and Samuel L. Jackson. Called The Negotiator. In this scenario we are Kevin Spacey. So, we are cops, on the outside of the building. We want to negotiate for a hostage. But who do we pick? The answer is simple. We pick Beck. And then he comes out and makes more music that will infect the repetitive listening portion of your brain. They can have everyone else, but we’d get Beck out first no matter what the cost.
Charlotte Gainsburg knows. She had Beck record most of her album at his studio in L.A. They dropped the song Heaven Can Wait together. You know, the one with Becks signature groove and soothing vocals. Plus Charlottes sultry pipes applying the appropriate amount of domination at just the right times. The song was good. Really good.
Then came along Los Angeles DJ Nosaj Thing to put together a remix. And everything became solid gold. Nosaj Thing is an expert in putting post-modern minimalistic beats and old-school hip-hop influence into a sound that you could say, wobbles. Beats that wobble. Last year he dropped Drift. It’s phenomenal. Buy it here.
The above videos are short clips of Nosaj Thing running the show. I suspect that watching The Visual Show Compilation would be the best 80 seconds of your day. There is literally only one way to find out.
Charlotte Gainsbourg – “Heaven Can Wait (Nosaj Thing Remix)”
The XX – Islands (Nosaj Thing remix)
FAST TRACK(s) FRIDAY – Pinback vs Spoon
I’m constantly getting these songs mixed up. “Fortress” started in the car the other day and I thought it was “Don’t You Evah.” Spoon started playing in the coffee shop this morning and I thought it was Pinback. Am I crazy? You decide…
Spoon – “Don’t You Evah”
Pinback – “Fortress”
P.S. Pinback is playing at the El Rey tomorrow, Saturday July 24th. Get tickets here.
Zack Hemsey Should Score Your Movie OR “You Are Blowing My Mind Hole Right Now!”
I saw Inception yesterday. I hate when people hype a movie, because it inevitably falls short of your built up expectations and then you don’t like it as much as your friends, and you sit there looking at each other not knowing what the other was smoking, because they obviously didn’t see the same movie as you, etc. etc.
But Holy Shit, people, this is the real deal. Not since Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind were my lofty expectations met AND exceeded. And it’s a sharp, smart movie. Never do I feel like they dumb it down for the “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader” audience. Instead, they tie your mind hands to their story hitch and drag you, screaming, along the dirt road of enlightenment. My jaw might still be on the floor of the Los Feliz Vista theater. If you find it, please take it to the Lost & Found. I’ll pick it up on one of my repeat viewings, ‘cause I certainly will be seeing this one again.
Now everyone’s been talking about it, and I’ve been looking forward to Chris Nolan’s oeuvre for quite some time, but I know the exact moment Inception infected my dreams and made my heart beat fluctuate with anticipation. It was hearing Zack Hemsey’s music in the trailer. Which is weird, because the movie is scored by Hans Zimmer. I don’t know who copied whom, but I actually think there is more power in the two minute score of the trailer than the whole movie soundtrack. This dude is going to have work for the rest of his life now, as long as people realize Zimmer didn’t do the trailer music.
It’s worth repeating: HANS ZIMMER DID NOT DO THE TRAILER MUSIC. Now, I’m not a Hans Hater or anything, I just want to give mind-job credit where mind-job credit is due.
And speaking of mind-job, let’s talk about i-doser! WTF. Frequencies to get you “digitally high”? Gotta be a scam. So I did what any good skeptic would do and paid money to disprove it. Three of us took turns listening in the dark with hi-tech headphone. One guy twitched. I felt a little tingly, kinda like I was on Vicodin. Oh, wait… I was… No matter what, the tracks are aurally scintillating, but I can’t see how they are a drug replacement. Enhancing at best.
Moral of the story, I’d take the mind-bending Inception over the mind-relaxing i-dose anytime. I had a better trip on the former.
Zack Hemsey – “Mind Heist”
Hans Zimmer – “Dream is Collapsing”
No Working Means More Working Out
My Unemployed Daily To Do List:
1. Get Coffee at Coffee Bean.*
2. Write Too Much Happiness Post.
3. Spend 15 minutes looking at job postings.
4. Spend 2 minutes drafting an application for a posting.
5. Trash draft email application.
6. 4 hours free time.
7. Afternoon workout.
8. 6 hours free time.
9. Drink myself to sleep.
That’s pretty close to my day, everyday. And it’s awesome. The only way it could be more awesome is if the government actually recognized my “unemployment” as their “unemployment”. OK, maybe not the ONLY way.**
But for this post, I want to focus on #7. Yes, that’s right, I now have joined the ranks of the unemployed, beautiful actors and fitness-minded “80 is the new 60” year-olds who get to enjoy a mid-day romp in the recreation room. Which means there’s no line for the cardio machines, which means I can usually snag the one under the AC, which means I can sustain much longer runs, and no one even gives me the stink eye while they are waiting.
Longer runs, more gym visits… this can only mean one thing. I need to expand my workout playlist! 2010 has a lot of great music, but not a ton that I want to exercise to, so the brush-up was a bit easier than last time. A couple of pumping beats, a couple of motivational foundations, and a few feel goods, and I’m well on my way to combating the damage wreaked on my body from the discovery of sweet potato chips and spicy hummus. Instead, I’m learning to satiate my appetite with morsels like these…
Miike Snow – “Cult Logic”
Morgan Page – “Fight For You”
LMFAO – “Shooting Star” (Party Rock Remix)
*That would be a “Regular Coffee with Cold Soy and Hazelnut,” Mr. Morse that’s 7 words, so I come in well under your max
** It could probably be more awesome if someone gave me a shit ton of money on a daily basis for doing something, like, maybe, writing.
Nine Horses, Nine Surprises OR “The Snow Bourne Ultimatum”
Fade In:
INT. DARK ROOM
Me: “…but then what? What next?”
Him: “A sex scene!”
Me: “But it’s a horror movie, don’t we want it to be scary?”
Him: “It’ll be a scary sex scene!”
Me: “A scary sex scene?”
Him: “Yeah.”
Me: “How will it be a scary sex scene?”
Him: “Because we’ll have this music…”
This is pretty much an actual conversation I had recently at a script meeting*. So then he puts on the band I’ve never heard of called Nine Horses. And sure enough, the music is silky, seductive and really effing creepy all at the same time! It’s a haunting smooth jazz that begs for candles and blood and love and violence.
Me: “Who’s this?”
Him: “Nine Horses.”
Me: “Who?”
Him: “Nine Horses. It’s a David Sylvian band.”
Me: “Who?”
Him: “David Sylvian. From the band, Japan.”
Me: “Who?”
Just when I start to feel cocky about my musical knowledge, something like this exchange will take place to knock my on my ego. So Japan was an late 70s/early 80s band in the area of Depeche Mode and Culture Club, but certainly on the fringe of that grouping, pushing synthpop/electronic in strange directions that were so far from mainstream. Anyway, David Sylvian is still doing very strange things with jazz and synth and electro, usually on his own, but back in 2005 got together with his brother, another guy from Japan, and Burnt Friedman. Together they are Nine Horses and “Snow Bourne Sorrow” is the only full album they’ve ever released. They even brought in Stina Nordenstam for some vocal work, right on.
The album is strange, but cool; eerie, but hypnotizing; haunting, but erotic. I’m going to push the limit of how many songs I should be posting here, but this is five years old, so no “JoyKillers@” emails, please…
Nine Horses – “Snow Bourne Sorrow”
Nine Horses – “The Banality of Evil”
Nine Horses – “Wonderful World” (ft. Stina Nordenstam)
And for good measure:
Stina Nordenstam – “People Are Strange” (UNKLE Remix)
*OK, it’s not verbatim, and I was way more into the idea that I made it out to look above, but we all stretch our stories for dramatic effect…
In Honor Of Lindsay Lohan Going To Jail
And being locked up with the girl who robbed her house and probably getting lots o’ lesbo love from Sam Ronson lookalikes…
The Perfect Summer Show That I Didn’t See
Grin and bear it. I clenched my teeth reading, literally, five posts in a row from friends who were at this concert. The bird and the bee, The Swell Season and She & Him. It is perhaps the most perfect summer show on the Hollywood Bowl’s summer schedule this year.
“Why didn’t you just buy a ticket?” you ask. “Why didn’t you plan ahead?” you scoff. I have news for you, dear reader. I DID. I had a ticket to this confluence of airy musical wonders. Let’s just say, I recently lost “custody” of said ticket and suddenly found myself on the awkward end of wanting to go and not wanting to go at the same time. It’s that uncanny dilemma of not knowing which is right and which you should do so you end up paralyzed with indecision letting the opportunities slip by without a fight.
Rereading that sentence, I start to wonder if I’m even still talking about the concert.
But I hear it was great! Second hand reports were excellent. All three bands killed. The bird and the bee kicked it off with the perfect sunset set and wowed with a Hall & Oates cover of “Sara Smile.” M.Ward and Zooey charmed the thousands of lucky so-and-sos as the stars above came out of the darkness to play backup. The Swell Season, as you should know by now, always meets and exceeds expectations of the people who say “Oh, they’re that couple from that movie…” Apparently the was a standing ovation. At the bowl… a standing ovation… …
It was a romantic night for duets that I will probably regret missing for a long, long time.*
the bird and the bee – “Sara Smile” (Hall & Oates Cover)
She & Him – “Bring It On Home To Me” (Sam Cooke Cover)
The Swell Season – “Young Hearts Run Free” (Candi Staton Cover)
And for good measure…
the bird and the bee – “I’m a Broken Heart”
*If you can’t tell yet, the theme for this whole week is going to be wallowing…
People Who Live in Crystal Castles Should Not Throw Gemstones OR “Breakups Are Hard”
Fuck you, Lady Antebellum.
I now dread punching the radio knob in the dashboard of my Kia Sorento for fear of finding tunes from the likes of you, bathed in bathos, dragging me into your sentimental worlds, trying to make me feel sorry for myself. This goes for all country and 60% of everything else. It’s in vulnerable times like these that I tend to focus my playlists on music with the ability to create and summon moods rather than beg me to feel something. Dream-pop, Shoe-gazing, Downtempo. It’s like an Electro pity party for a little while after a separation, wallowing in albums on repeat for hours.
OK, OK. So maybe it hasn’t exactly been a habit before now, but I’m certainly lost in Crystal Castles (II) now. I automatically have to respect a band that self titles their debut album and then DOES IT AGAIN the second time round. And the album does a fantastic job of taking sharp corners, building climaxes and slapping you in the eardrums with awesome track-to-track reversals. The album picks up in a circus-like chaos, settles down, pulls you along long corridors of aural grace, then throws you down and finishes in ecstasied frenzy. I particularly like the corridors of aural grace part, track six through nine (you’re welcome).
So, join me in an ambient malaise. The album’s a couple months old, but, after all, so is my negligence in posting. Let’s change all that starting today. Maybe it’s like the song you can’t get out of your head until you hear it, or the joke you keep thinking about until you can tell it to someone else. I have to share these feelings with you all before I can rid myself of them. Ah, blog therapy.
Crystal Castles – “Violent Dreams”
Crystal Castles – “Suffocation”
The Hood Internet – “I’m Shinin’ Like a Crystal” (The Pack vs Crystal Castles)
